What. The. Eff.

i don't usually write two posts on one day but an event occurred that definitely warrants this.

taryn and i were up for a bit of a wander this afternoon and thought that since we were on our way to the dominion anyway we might as well try to figure out where jamie's pool is. i've been looking to find some iron-on transfer paper and i knew that he would have some leads and we thought that knowing someone in the 'hood that has the power to let us swim is never a bad thing.

so we gambled on which building he works at and were pleasantly surprised when i peered through the cage and saw jamie sitting out lifeguarding. we were just chatting and hanging out when out of the building comes none other than COREY HAIM.

he was hanging out with a buddy but definitely there to see jamie. since he was behind me and t he just motioned to jamie. jamie, not actually having anything on him was like, "sorry man, i don't have anything now, i'll try to hook you up but ... " he didn't sound particularly interested in the whole thing but corey haim was like "bro, you know, just like let me know when you get hooked up." jamie sort of nodded and said he'd do what he could. so corey haim says "dude, i'll just give you my number and you can give me a call" and he writes on a piece of paper: COREY HAIM and his phone number.

like there was ANY way possible that jamie was going to forget that corey haim gave him his phone number. taryn and i were just happy that we witnessed the most ridiculous interaction ever. we honestly couldn't even look at each during the whole thing because of the laughs we were trying to keep inside.

anyway, to answer the title question of the Thrills song "Whatever Happened to Corey Haim?" i would have to say: he got fat and lives in an apartment down the street from me, apparently trying to get pot from the lifeguard at his tiny pool that overlooks a parking lot and a public high school. hot.

You Will Not Join a Harem!

this blog is getting a bit predictable, i recognize that. very little
happens during the week and apart from the odd rant i am not
particularly motivated to write. mostly i want to make it through the
week as quietly as possible in order to make the most of my weekends.
hence, i prefer to spin my yarns and tell you my tales on sundays.
the downside is that sundays are also the day my brain only works at
forty percent capacity. regardless, i will push on through ...

last friday was all about going downtown, catching up with old
friends, and rocking out! taryn and i headed down to jamie's house to
hang out, listen to some tunes and get ready for our night out. he
regaled us with a tale of fat corey haim who swims at the pool where
he lifeguards. apparently looking to score some pot corey was
chatting jamie up while his ragged girlfriend looked on. what a long
way from the glory days of "the lost boys" and "license to drive."

then we rocked the death from above 1979 show. we got there a little
bit early hoping to see seb, which we did, but since he was hanging
out with his mom we just hung out and got a few drinks in. taryn and
i were lurked by a crazy dude with black overalls and long stringy
hair covered by a harley davidson painter cap. unable to decipher
anything he said to us we made a point of being very very interested
in the markings on the bar. anything to avoid further eye contact.

the actual show was awesome. being too short to see anything that was
going on onstage, besides the odd glimpse of seb and jesse's heads, i
just enjoyed the sound and really got into it. it was wicked to see
everyone getting so involved. according to the tall people i was
standing near seb took his shirt off fairly early but sported his
short-shorts and jaunty cap the whole way through. i can't confirm
that of course since i couldn't see jack.

we ended up being able to catch up with seb a bit after the show when
his fans were done with him. he didn't sign my tits (like i
"jokingly" asked him to) which was probably a good thing since i had a
pretty swanky saturday night.

ben and allie got married at canoe yesterday. after a day spent with my family, getting yelled at by my grandparents for being disgracefully single and in my mid-twenties, i was ready to enjoy the company of people who were less concerned about my relationship status.

i'm pretty sure my mom was drunk before the hors d'oeuvres were out and i erroneously thought that laing might be a responsible friend and get her to keep a lid on things. it was a big mistake. but at the very least it gave drew and i a more interesting topic in common apart from just international politics and big brother.

the ceremony was awesome and perfectly suited ben and allie. they looked gorgeous and it seemed as though everyone was having an amazing time. i was seated beside julia during dinner and we had a great time catching up. although that was interrupted by my mother accusing me of discretions that allegedly occured somewhere around grade 11. bizarre.

in discussing her upcoming move to dubai robin mentioned to my parents
that she might just marry an oil tycoon and live it up in the middle
east. not in a state to recognize "sarcasm" or "comedy" my mom took
it upon herself to vehemently advise robin to "not join a harem." as
it turned out my dad seemed to be more pro-harem than i would have
expected.

taryn and i ended up getting a ride home with vanessa and andy. i
don't know if she was trying to earn her keep but t took it upon
herself to squeegee the car before we left the parking lot. it wasn't
that dirty! my mom on the other hand went home to throw up and vow
never to drink, yet again!

ok, here are some memorable quotes from the weekend:

"don't worry, its just my guitar" - said to taryn after being
straight-armed on the subway
"she's got some bubbles in her tink-tank" - said by chris after
ordering a ginger ale for wendy
"hey seb, sign my tits"
"i think you should go with the peer-pressure" - said by my dad when i
was torn between going home or drinking more